Dwell in Discomfort

You’ve asked me the same questions over and over and over again.

And mostly they have to do with discomfort.

  • “I’m not sure my work is good enough.”
  • “I’m an introvert so I never go to events or conferences.”
  • “I clam up when it’s time to state my prices.”
  • “I feel like everyone’s going to know that I’m a fraud.”
  • “I’m totally tech-phobic.”

And you let these persistent thoughts keep you stuck in the dim grey of not-doing.

And the world spins on.

You don’t start your business.
You don’t write your book.
You don’t make enough money.
You don’t make friends with powerful people.
You don’t fulfill your creative promise.

And the world spins on.

Waiting for your work.
Waiting for you to be bold.
Waiting for you to share your heart with us.

It’s like we’re in some odd stand-off: the world is waiting for your art, and you are waiting to feel comfortable.

This is totally backwards.

You will never feel comfortable BEFORE you take a risk.

You only feel comfortable afterwards.

(And, to be frank, sometimes not even then.)

So you dwell in a twilight of discomfort.

No crashing failures.
No exhilarating leaps of faith.

Just the slow drip of
“I’m not ready,”
“I’m not sure,” and
“Now’s not a good time.”

And the world spins on.

But honey – now is the ONLY time there is.

All of us – we only have today.

Tomorrow is promised to no one.

So please –

Grab your discomfort by the nape of the neck and drag it along with your art into the clear light of day.

And I promise – if you smile while you do it, we will be so dazzled by your bravery that we won’t notice if you wobble a bit.

Smiling and wobbling our way into the future, together we can make this world a better place.

Sam.

Are You Freaking Out Yet?

Are You Freaking Out Yet?

Taking a big step in the direction of your dreams seems like it should be easy, right?

After all – isn’t this what you’ve always wanted?

So then why do I get emails like this:

Hi Sam —

I just wanted to put it out there that I am feeling rather nervous and scared about coming to The Big Yes.

The old feelings of ‘lack’ and ‘scarcity’ and ‘putting everyone else’s needs ahead of my own’ keep popping up. Initiating changes has stirred things up – money considerations, etc. are causing doubts and guilt. Yikes!

Stuff at work is unsettled, some family stuff has come up…. (I could go on and on, but I won’t).

Any thoughts or words of wisdom to share?

M.

Do you know the feeling?

Yep. Me, too.

So I wrote back:

 

Dear M —

YES! YES! YES!

HOORAY for you for noticing the old patterns that keep you stuck!

Because, honey — that’s it. And know that this is ALL you need to move forward: the knowledge that all that old crap — all those doubts and fears — are just an express elevator to hell.

Your FUTURE is on the other side of all this discomfort.

Learn to welcome the discomfort.
It means you are trying something new.
It means you are growing.
It means you are just ONE DEGREE away from being exactly where you want to be.

The trouble is that this uncomfortable moment you are in right now is where most people quit.

The pressure is too much.

The money-thing seems so real. (SO real!)

The family thing flares up.

The monsters under the bed somehow double in population and – hey – who gave my Mom’s voice the megaphone???

Take it from me, babe – it’s all an illusion.

The money thing is an illusion (you know it will work out. it always does.)

The family thing is an illusion (you know they will be just fine no matter what and you staying stuck doesn’t help them one bit)

The monster thing is an illusion (you’ve known that forever)

So…deep breath.
Welcome to your future.

Time for some comforting reading (Harry Potter, anyone? Annie Lamott?), extra kleenex, get a lot of sleep and maybe buy a cute new outfit or get your hair done.

Call a supportive friend.
Journal.
Be here now.

You can do it!!!

All this fear and anxiety is just the SIGN you’ve been waiting for that you MUST do it.

Think of this as stage fright: you’re about to start starring in your own life.

It’s perfectly natural to have jitters.
And still — the show must go on.

(Can you imagine if you stopped the show now, just because you got scared? The audience sent away…the sets torn down…the chorus girls taking off their make-up…. it’s too sad to even contemplate. You MUST go on!)

HOORAY for you!

And HOORAY for you reaching out and admitting the TRUTH!

I can’t WAIT to see what happens next.

xoxooxoxo
Sam.

 

And if you’re interested in YOUR future, then please join me for a LIVE encore of one of the most popular free webinars I’ve ever done:

The Real Reason You’re Not Making Money from Your Creativity (it’s not what you think)

—> click here to register now

Wednesday, May 14
5pm PT/8pm ET/1am GMT
(check your timezone here: www.TimeZoneCheck.com)

We’ll send you the link ahead of time – all you need is a computer and good, fast internet connection.

—> click here to register now

The recording will be available afterwards, but there’s a very special offer that’s going to be made, and you’ll want to be there live. I’m not trying to be all hype-y, I’m just saying that I think you’ll be mad at yourself if you miss this opportunity.

If you have any questions, thoughts or comments please email us at Leonore@TheOrganizedArtistCompany.com or give us a call at (805) 881-3699.

Thank you so much for being a part of my circle….

And please do tell me how it goes for you, OK? I’m always interested to hear about your projects.

You inspire me.

 

Prepare To Be Uncomfortable

Recently a client asked me how to tell the difference between the natural anxiety a person has when they’re moving forward into something new and the gut instinct that something is truly wrong for them.  Good question, right?

And the answer is: I don’t think you can tell the difference.  At least not right away.

Both of those feelings are so profoundly uncomfortable that it’s easy to see why some people stay stuck in the familiar.  As my wise friend Amy Ahlers once told me, “If you are out of your comfort zone, you can expect to feel uncomfortable.”

I think the only solution is to take a few deep breaths, recognize that discomfort is part of change and then take a few small, manageable steps toward the new thing.  Then you can look around and see how it all feels: are you feeling supported and excited?  Are unexpected angels conspiring to help you?  Are you enjoying yourself?  Or are there roadblocks and potholes and feelings of wrongness?

Only once you have taken a few steps into the unknown territory can you determine if you should keep going or not.  You can’t tell from where you are.

But do not underestimate how very uncomfortable it can feel to start to play in a bigger arena, to put your self out there, to begin a new work.  You will feel vulnerable, afraid and very….exposed.  And here’s what’s worse: no one will give you credit for your bravery.  They will just sort of assume that it must be easy for you to publish, to perform, to create, to change your world.  Because that’s just how cool you are.

(And also notice that you make that assumption, too.  When your friend releases a new CD of original songs or mounts a gallery show or puts up their Etsy shop, you don’t automatically think of all the blood, sweat and tears they must have poured out to accomplish that work.  You just think, “Oh.  Cool.  They did that.”  So maybe next time give them a bit of a pat on the back, nu?)

You must hold your own hand, talk yourself off of whatever ledges you find yourself on, reward yourself with lots of treats, surround yourself with a few compatriots who will acknowledge your efforts and then…keep walking.

Pay attention to the foreboding feeling in your belly, but don’t let it make your decisions for you, OK?