I love bad reviews

I love bad reviews

I love good reviews more, of course.

But I love ALL reviews.

Anytime someone cares enough about what I’m doing to take the time to comment, I’m deeply honored.

Whether they love it or hate it or are just “meh” about it is none of my business. People are allowed to think and feel however they like, and it really has nothing to do with me.

Are you having a hard time digesting that?
Think of it this way: you know that none of their other opinions have to do with you, right?
I mean, if someone said, “Oh, I just loathe peanut butter and jelly sandwiches!” you wouldn’t take that personally, would you? You know that their feeling about PB&J isn’t about you, yes? Right. So just because the opinion under discussion happens to be “you” or “your work” does not make it any more or less about you. It’s all about them.
The moment someone starts to talk about likes and dislikes, or about “better” and “best,” they have stopped talking about the thing itself and they have started talking about themselves. (Thanks to Carolyn Bremer for the origin of this pithy phrasing.)
Here’s why I bring this up:

I was getting ready for another drive into LA, which takes about 90 minutes, and I was thinking that maybe instead of listening to a podcast, I might download a new audio book.
While cruising Audible books and reviews, I realized that I had never once looked up my own books to see their reviews.

Durrrrr….

So I look them up and…

They are just lovely!

People say the most wonderful things about my writing and about my narration and I’m just beaming over here.
And the one negative review cracked me up so much my ego forgot to even wince.
(Laughter almost always defeats ego. Try it.)
Take a look at the screenshots below and you can see for yourself.
And if you’re looking for something nice to listen to, please consider

“Get It Done: From Procrastination to Creative Genius in 15 Minutes a Day” or use this aff link: http://amzn.to/2vKEK6s

OR

“Start Right Where You Are: How Little Changes Can Make a Big Difference for Overwhelmed Procrastinators, Frustrated Overachievers and Recovering Perfectionists” or use this aff link: http://amzn.to/2eP4R8x

And for what’s it worth, I think your work is fabulous.

I also love PB&J.

Yours,
Sam

The Isle of Skye

The Isle of Skye

 

The Isle of Skye

What if there was
another you who lived on the Isle of Skye?

And what if, in the soft light of that
other home,
you forgot to think the thoughts
that hold you back?

What if, in the mist,
you knew all,
you forgave all,
and you remembered to be
oh so gentle with yourself?

What if you, on the Isle of Skye,
could just breathe,
wearing a warm sweater
and half a smile?

And what if your heart’s own work just flowed out of you –
lipping in between the endless hills and endless sea – a balm unto the world?

© 2014 Samantha Bennett

 

It’s Okay to Make Nice with Yourself

It’s Okay to Make Nice with Yourself

Guess what? It’s okay to have some positive thoughts about yourself.

Many of us were raised in intellectual households, where if you couldn’t prove your point, well, you were just being delusional. I’m asking you to be a little delusional. You may be reluctant to think nice thoughts about yourself. I understand. You may feel that your negative thoughts “keep you in line” and you don’t want to “get a big head.”

Darling, you will not get a big head. I promise.

EXERCISE: TEN NICE THINGS

Step 1. Write Down Ten Successes, Wins, or Blessings from the Past Year.

Grab a pen and write down ten good things that have happened in the past twelve months. It’s time to give those chattering critical voices in your head a rest. It’s time to change the tape. It’s time to accentuate the positive.

If it doesn’t work, no worries — you can always go back to thinking negatively any time you’d like.

(“I paid off all my credit cards” or “I learned how to cook a perfect roast chicken”), things that happened to you (“My cousin gave me that wonderful birthday present” or “I got asked to perform the solo”), things that happened around you (“There is some jasmine growing right next to my bedroom window, and it smells heavenly” or “Those noisy neighbors finally moved away”) or (most likely) some combination of the above.

Don’t have a contest with yourself about the “best” things that happened to you; just list some things that, when you reread the list, make you nod and smile to yourself and think, “Yep. That’s pretty good.”

Step 2. Write Down Ten Nice Things about Yourself.

Now make a list of ten nice things about you. They may be nice qualities that you were born with, like your quick mind and your lovely eyes. They may be nice skills you’ve learned, like your gorgeous gardening skills and your ability to run a mile without losing your breath.

Or maybe they’re things other people appreciate about you, like what a safe and courteous driver you are, and how you always remember everyone’s birthday. Push yourself to come up with ten.

After all, the assignment is not to write down ten extraordinary things about you, or ten things that no one else in the world has ever done — just ten nice things that, again, you can look at and say, “Yep. That’s pretty good.”

A Prayer for Hoping against Hope

A Prayer for Hoping against Hope

And as you stand there

Hands clasped in front of you

Eyes downcast

Concealing the disobedient pounding of your heart
It dawns on you:

Here we go again.

And while you no longer allow yourself the long, elaborate
daydreams in which everything works out perfectly,
You catch yourself thinking: Well, it could happen.

And though you have long since given up making bargains
with God,

You find yourself whispering: Please.

And since you have — years ago — quit telling
Anyone anything about anything
Because honestly,
The things people say, such as,

“Oh, it will happen for you, I just know it!”

Really?

“I have a friend who went through the same thing and then one
day, just like magic. . .”

Really?

“The minute you stop wanting it, that’s when it will happen.”

Oh. Okay.

So you haven’t told a soul.

Except, after long consideration, your very dearest best friend.

And you know the odds are against you.

And still

You know that life is not a numbers game and
The Lord does, indeed, move in some very mysterious ways and

Haven’t you earned —
And there you stop short.

Because life is also not about earning or deserving,

And it doesn’t matter how hard you’ve tried or how much you’ve
sacrificed or how positive your positive mental attitude has
been.

What matters is reality.

And reality says: It’s possible.

So you dwell in possibility.

Between the dark and the daylight.

No longer storming off, slamming doors, and swearing, “Never
again.”

No longer crying out in agony because you had been so sure this
was It.

No longer elated by another promising sign.

You are here now.

Committed to enjoying the ride.

Trusting in the friendliness of the universe.

Awakened to your heart’s desire.

Knowing that there is no such thing as false hope.

All hope is real.

Real. Hope. Now.

It’s all we have.

And who knows?

Perhaps the best really is
Yet to come.

A Prayer for the Capable

A Prayer for the Capable

And as you stand there
On time and Appropriately clad for the event
With a high-fiber bar in your bag
And extra pens

Let us take this moment to applaud you.

You, the prepared.

You, the accomplished.

You, the bills-paid-on-time and the-taxes-done-in-March.

You, who always returns the shopping cart.

You, who never throws a tantrum.

While the moody, the irresponsible, the near-hysterical, and the
rude seem to get ALL the attention

Let us now praise you.

Just because everyone always expects you to do well.

Does not make it any less remarkable

That you always do so well.

So thank you.

For picking up the slack

For not imposing

For being so kind

And mannerly

And attending to all those pesky details.

Thank you for your consideration,

Your generosity,

For always remembering and never forgetting:

That a job well done is its own reward

That the opportunity to help someone else is a gift

That the complainers, the crybabies, the drama queens, the never-use-a-turn-signals, the forgetful, the self-involved, the choleric, the phlegmatic, and the your-rules-don’t-apply-tome-types

Need you to rebel against in order to look like rebels.

You provide the lines — for without the lines, well, what would they color outside of?

So take a minute To pat yourself on the back

And say, “Job well done.”

And as you consider someday

Showing up stoned

Or unprepared

Or not at all

And as you imagine someday being imperious

Or demanding

Or the one with the temper

Hear  the unspoken “thank-you” from a

Grateful nation that is a

Better, smarter, calmer, easier, friendlier, and more organized place

Thanks to you

And your dogged diligence.

You are beautiful.

You are precious to us.

You are the hand that calms the water, the wheel that never
squeaks, the one we all rely on

And while you probably would have remembered to send a thank you
note,

We forgot.

And just because everyone always expects you

To do well

Does not make it any less remarkable

That you always do so well.

And I would tell you to take the afternoon for yourself
Or sleep in tomorrow

But I’m pretty sure you already have plans.

So just take this very moment right now
To appreciate you

And all that you have done and done well

Even by your own high standards.

And remember:

You are beautiful.

And just because everyone always expects you to
Do well

Does not make it any less amazing, delightful, or delicious that
You always do so well.