We hear this story all the time:
“I tried everything! And then finally…”
Finally, the solution is found.
Finally, the right diet and exercise plan kicks in.
Finally, your perfect partner arrives in your life.
Finally, the gate that seemed locked is opened.
And maybe part of us thinks,
“Jeez, if only I’d tried this sooner…”
But to me, the important part of the story is the first part:
I Tried Everything.
Yes, you did. You tried things and you kept trying and you kept showing up and you persisted even when you were so discouraged you couldn’t even think straight. That’s how a person gets to the “finally” part. By staying on the path and putting one foot in front of the other.
That’s faith in action.
And for those of you who haven’t gotten to the “finally” part of the story – oh, honey – I feel your pain.
Especially when everyone around you has such helpful suggestions. Suggestions like, “Oh, when you stop trying – that’s when it will happen!” Really? Or, “You should try this thing that worked for me/my sister/my neighbor’s best friend in Ohio.” Really?
And maybe you’re even thinking about giving up. And maybe you should.
Here’s one way to get a reading on whether or not you should just give up: make a picture in your mind of you just setting down this burden. Imagine you just taking the whole heavy load and setting it down right there on the side of the road. Imagine taking a few steps down the road away from it.
How do you feel? Relieved?
Then maybe, sweetheart, it’s time to set it down for now – not necessarily for always, but for now.
Or do you feel that welling up of spirit (your parents might have called it “stubbornness”) that says, “I WILL find a way!” If that’s so, then all righty. Pick your bundle up and walk on. And keep trying everything – even crazy things, even the thing that worked for that person in Ohio.
And someday – I guarantee it – you will be able to tell the story of your journey and say, “Well, I tried everything, and then finally…”
So tell me – what circumstance in your life had you trying everything? And what finally worked? Or are you still in it? What have you tried? What are you thinking of doing next?
Wondering how to balance a global mission and a humble heart?
How to handle all those pesky compliments?
What to do when you don’t really believe you’re all that great but you still need to promote yourself?
Yep. Me, too.
Plus I got this inquiry the other day:
Hi Sam,
Thanks for yesterday’s call – it was really inspiring.
You said that your big challenge had been visibility, and “putting on your rock star coat” (I loved that image). That’s exactly what I struggle with – coming out from hiding.
I’d love to hear more about how you stepped out into the light – if there’s specific steps you took, how you coped with the emotional backlash of being more seen etc. Also the spiritual tension of humility v reaching for the stars…
Thanks again!
Best wishes,
D.
So I created the following call — please feel free to listen, download and share it — no registration required.
You’ll find out why you must:
1) Be a unicorn.
2) Be a rose.
3) Be gracious.
4) Be the department store Santa
5) Be 1% more present.
6) Be YOU.
7) Be an open, spiritually-centered vessel for money, success and praise.
“Just what I needed to hear today as I prep for the BIG YES! Thanks. You mentioned so many things that shoot right to the heart of my worries.” – G.A.
“Hi Sam! This was a GREAT call. Thank you for sharing your knowledge!” – R.C.
So…what do you think?
Are you willing to start using your magical powers for good?
P.S. I make a few references to my upcoming event
The Big Yes: How To Overcome Procrastination, Perfectionism and Self-Doubt and Make Money from Your Creativity
June 20-23, 2013
San Diego, CA
and there’s still a few tickets available — if you’re interested you can find out more here: www.BigYesRevolution.com — Thanks!
Dear Sam:
I have a question. The book that I want to write…I am wondering if it will be useful or if anyone would want to read it.
What do I do with this feeling of ‘who cares about your work, all the effort you put in is useless….’
If you could help I would be grateful.
Best,
A.
Dear A.,
Every single person throughout human history suffers from self-doubt, secretly believes they are a fraud and wonders if anyone will care about their work.
You are not alone.
In fact, your doubts may be part of what makes you an artist. I’ve heard it said that only dilettantes and amateurs never doubt their talent.
And I’ve noticed that the more daring the creative idea, the more vicious and violent those critical inner voices can become.
So over time, I’ve learned this:
the louder & meaner the voices in my head are, the greater the probability that I’ve just had a really juicy idea.
Think of it this way: the voices in your head are trying to keep you safe. They don’t want you to put yourself in a vulnerable position. They try to scare you into inaction by telling you that no one will care about your work. Or worse, that people will judge you harshly.
But art is about making yourself vulnerable.
That’s kind of the point.
Or at least part of the point.
And let’s face facts – it’s possible that you will create something that other people don’t care for.
Fear of failure is entirely reasonable. But it’s no reason not to do your work.
As long as your work remains unwritten in your head, it has no effect on anyone. Except you. And then not in a good way.
Once you let your idea out of the hermetically sealed vault of your brain and out into the fresh air, the idea will immediately start to evolve. The minute you get it down on a piece of paper, it will change.
And then, once you let it out of the house – once someone else gets to experience it – then you are all changed.
You are changed.
The project is changed.
The audience is changed.
That’s the alchemy of art.
And here’s a real-life example:
Nedi, a 365 Club Member, worked with her son to compose a song about Autism. She finally got the courage to get it mastered, and she posted it online. She started getting emails and responses – including one from Kate Winslet’s Golden Hat foundation (http://www.goldenhatfoundation.org/) and now she’s created a Kickstarter Project to move the project into its next phase: http://kck.st/NBCsLo
Here’s what Nedi herself said:
Before three weeks ago, I thought to myself “Who cares if I do my 15 minutes?” But THEN a little voice said to me, “Samantha would care.”
So, on the off chance that the voice was right, and to keep myself on track: I will tell you that I completed 30 min. the first week, 60 the next, and since yesterday’s call – 90 min!
Much Gratitude and Affection,
NEDI
Inspiring, right?
Those critical voices will always be with you. I’ve never met an artist who didn’t struggle against them. Me included.
It’s up to you to decide if they get to run the show.
I can’t guarantee you that getting your work out there will always lead to success.
I can guarantee you that not getting your work out there will always lead to feelings of failure.
If you would like a very inexpensive way to get some additional encouragement and support, you might enjoy participating in the extremely groovy membership club I’ve started — we’re having a blast!
Please let me know how it goes for you.
Remember: The World Needs Your Art.
I am not exaggerating when I say that I owe my very life to the teachers, coaches and camp counselors (yes, I went to theatre camp – Camp Harand, anyone?) who taught me how to act and, in the process, taught me how to live.
This past October I was delighted to be asked to present two days worth of workshops for CETA (California Educational Theatre Association: http://www.cetoweb.org) at their annual retreat at Asilomar, CA. We had a blast. To honor them and the extraordinary work of teachers everywhere, I wrote this poem.
Poem – Ode To The Drama Teacher
And as you stand there: Aghast
Because we’re three days from Opening Night and
Ado Annie still doesn’t know her lines and
The Dream Ballet is a Nightmare and
The Light Board Op just got Detention…
Let us now praise You.
You, the Permanently Fatigued.
You, the Loyal-to-the-Point-of-Self-Neglect.
You, the Keeper of a Thousand-and-Eleventeen Secret Dreams.
You are the one who makes it all Look So Easy.
Who would have expected that the most important Skill you learned getting your BA
Was Juggling?
Juggling Paperwork and Personalities and oh, right – weren’t you supposed to have a
Private Life around here somewhere?
But even though you are Sick to Death of
Spoon River Anthology
You still puddle up every time you hear
There’s A Place For Us
No matter how Off-Key.
And while you still remember when you
Brought the House Down in
Midsummer
You now love This House.
You have created a House where any child – no matter how Flamboyant, no matter how Shy –
Can embrace their Inner Ethel Merman (and thanks to those English 101 classes you now must teach, you are keenly aware that using “their” in the previous sentence is increasingly considered correct and honestly, it’s really the only sensible answer as writing “his or her” is as damaging to poetry as the participle that dangles.)
And you have created a House where any child – no matter how Flamboyant, no matter how Shy – can dive straight to the Deepest, Darkest, Quietest corner of human suffering and bring a room of teenagers – and yes, you, too – to silent tears.
You have made a Home for the Misunderstood
A Family for the Misfit and a
Safe Spot to land no matter how bad The Mid-Terms are.
Because despite all the Budget Cuts and
The Paperwork and
The Meetings about the Meeting to Schedule the Meetings and
The Truancies and
The Parents
Dear God The Parents and
Did we mention The Paperwork?
Nothing on this Green Earth compares to watching a group of kids
Learn the true meaning of Ensemble.
And nothing compares to the pure joy of watching The Ones whom you knew would Eventually Get It
Finally. Really. Get It.
And nothing nothing nothing compares to The Confidences shared in low tones as they seek you out in
Your Office,
The Choir Room
The Front Seat of the Van on the way home from Fullerton.
You aren’t teaching Drama.
You are teaching Life
Which we all know is a Comedy – a Chekhovian Comedy – but a Comedy nonetheless.
And you aren’t teaching Choreography
You are teaching them to Dance.
And you aren’t teaching them how to be a Character.
You are teaching them how to be Themselves.
So here’s to you –
Making room for Art in a world that seems to have no room for Art.
(Because, by the way, that room has been repurposed as the new Standardized Test Prep Center – you don’t mind rehearsing outside, do you?)
And here’s to you –
Scrounging around for new shows that somehow match the sets you already have
Because some Genius on the School Board has
Recently Announced that not only can you not perform Huckleberry Finn
Or Anouilh’s Antigone (probably because he couldn’t pronounce it) and
Given the flap over theScene from M. Butterfly last year, I guess
March of the Falsettos and The Vagina Monologues are
Out of the Question for the Spring
So Oh Dear God it looks like it’s going to be
Arsenic And Old Lace one more blessed time.
But that’s OK
I love Arsenic And Old Lace.
So here’s to you –
Making room for Another Coffee Mug with
Those Damn Masks on them
Making room in the Chorus for
Just One More
And
Making room for Each and Every Child
To Be
A
Star.
© 2011 Samantha Bennett
If you would like to share or reprint this poem, I’d be honored. Please include my full name and website address (https://therealsambennett.com) and here is a bio you might want to include –
About the author: Samantha Bennett is a working actor and writer based in Los Angeles, and she’s the creator of https://therealsambennett.com, an organization dedicated to helping creative people get unstuck from whatever way they’re stuck, especially by helping them focus and move forward on their goals.
Poem – Ode To The Drama Teacher
And as you stand there: Aghast
Because we’re three days from Opening Night and
Ado Annie still doesn’t know her lines and
The Dream Ballet is a Nightmare and
The Light Board Op just got Detention…
Let us now praise You.
You, the Permanently Fatigued.
You, the Loyal-to-the-Point-of-Self-Neglect.
You, the Keeper of a Thousand-and-Eleventeen Secret Dreams.
You are the one who makes it all Look So Easy.
Who would have expected that the most important Skill you learned getting your BA
Was Juggling?
Juggling Paperwork and Personalities and oh, right – weren’t you supposed to have a
Private Life around here somewhere?
But even though you are Sick to Death of
Spoon River Anthology
You still puddle up every time you hear
There’s A Place For Us
No matter how Off-Key.
And while you still remember when you Brought the House Down in
Midsummer
You now love This House.
You have created a House where any child – no matter how Flamboyant, no matter how Shy –
Can embrace their Inner Ethel Merman (and thanks to those English 101 classes you now must teach, you are keenly aware that using “their” in the previous sentence is increasingly considered correct and honestly, it’s really the only sensible answer as writing “his or her” is as damaging to poetry as the participle that dangles.)
And you have created a House where any child – no matter how Flamboyant, no matter how Shy – can dive straight to the Deepest, Darkest, Quietest corner of human suffering and bring a room of teenagers – and yes, you, too – to silent tears.
You have made a Home for the Misunderstood
A Family for the Misfit and a
Safe Spot to land no matter how bad The Mid-Terms are.
Because despite all the Budget Cuts and
The Paperwork and
The Meetings about the Meeting to Schedule the Meetings and
The Truancies and
The Parents
Dear God The Parents and
Did we mention The Paperwork?
Nothing on this Green Earth compares to watching a group of kids
Learn the true meaning of Ensemble.
And nothing compares to the pure joy of watching The Ones whom you knew would Eventually Get It
Finally. Really. Get It.
And nothing nothing nothing compares to The Confidences shared in low tones as they seek you out in Your Office,
The Choir Room
The Front Seat of the Van on the way home from Fullerton.
You aren’t teaching Drama.
You are teaching Life
Which we all know is a Comedy – a Chekhovian Comedy – but a Comedy nonetheless.
And you aren’t teaching Choreography
You are teaching them to Dance.
And you aren’t teaching them how to be a Character.
You are teaching them how to be Themselves.
So here’s to you –
Making room for Art in a world that seems to have no room for Art.
(Because, by the way, that room has been repurposed as the new Standardized Test Prep Center – you don’t mind rehearsing outside, do you?)
And here’s to you –
Scrounging around for new shows that somehow match the sets you already have
Because some Genius on the School Board has
Recently Announced that not only can you not perform Huckleberry Finn
Or Anouilh’s Antigone (probably because he couldn’t pronounce it) and
Given the flap over the
Scene from M. Butterfly last year, I guess
March of the Falsettos and The Vagina Monologues are
Out of the Question for the Spring
So Oh Dear God it looks like it’s going to be
Arsenic And Old Lace one more blessed time.
But that’s OK
I love Arsenic And Old Lace.
So here’s to you –
Making room for another Coffee Mug with those damn masks on them
Making room in the Chorus for Just One More
And
Making room for each and every child
To Be
A
Star.
© 2011 Samantha Bennett
Created especially for the CETA (California Educational Theatre Association) Conference, Asilomar, CA, October 21-23, 2011
11×17 and laminated – perfect for the office, backstage, rehearsal room or classroom!
Interested in obtaining permission to reprint content from this site?
Email Us: Samantha_Bennett@TheOrganizedArtistCompany.com
WOW – I have never done a free call where so many people had so many questions about book writing, publishing and marketing…clearly, this is HOT : ) And while the wonderful Book Coach Lisa Tener (www.LisaTener.com) and I tried to answer as many questions as we could in the 60-minute call, we wanted to see if we could cover even more ground… So for this week, Lisa & I will be answering questions on her Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/BringYourBookToLife?sk=wall#!/BringYourBookToLife (link doesn’t work? search for, “Lisa Tener: Bring Your Book To Life) Here’s some of the nice feedback we received during the call —
“Awesome teleconference. Thank you. [Samantha] and Lisa are absolutely wonderful; the wisdom you shared fell upon very attentive ears. I am reignited! Thank you again.” – Angela O.
“GREAT call with Samantha Bennett [and Lisa Tener] today about publishing. The call fortified my resolve to get the book out there right now…all of them!” – Anna S.
“Great info in small time frame. Good work!” – Brian L.
Here’s the downloadable recording – let me know what you think! (Click on the player to listen now, or right-click (or for Mac users, “control”-click) and select “Save As” to save the MP3 to your desktop.)
