Some years ago I was suffering from some fairly extreme anxiety.
One of the ways the anxiety manifested was that I felt like I was being constantly graded.
During every meal I cooked, every parallel-parking job, every audition, every everything, I felt like someone, somewhere, was monitoring my every move and keeping track in a big notebook about how well or, more often, how poorly I was executing my life.
Exhausting.
So I decided that if I could not disabuse myself of the idea that I was being graded, then I would just try to get a C — which is the grade you get for showing up and doing the work.
Not doing the work better than everyone else, not doing extra-credit work — just showing up and doing the work.
I was quite pleased with this idea, and I shared it with my sister during one of our almost-daily phone conversations. She agreed that it sounded like a jim-dandy strategy and wished me luck with it.
Then we went on to discuss the real topic of our conversation that day: our father had moved into a new apartment and we wanted to send him a housewarming gift. I said I would take care of it.
A day or two later we were on the phone again and she asked me if I’d sent anything to Dad yet.
“Well, no,” I explained, “because I want to get him something nice but still within our budget, and I was thinking about something for his kitchen although he already has quite a bit of kitchen stuff so maybe there ’s a better idea if we do some sheets or maybe towels, maybe monogrammed, or —”
“Sam!” my sister interrupted. “Get a C — send a plant.”
Ah, the pure ring of truth!
Ten minutes later I had spent less than fifty bucks at an online flower delivery website for a handsome dieffenbachia plant, and the next day my father called both of us to say thank you and to tell us how lucky he felt to have such thoughtful daughters.
Here’s the point: my desire to find the perfect thing for my father was preventing me from finding anything for my father.
My willingness to take the budget-friendly, obvious option (a houseplant) allowed me to do what we really wanted to do to begin with, which was just let our dad know that we loved him and hoped he was happy in his new digs.
There are two more reasons you can afford to get a C.
One, your version of a C is probably everybody else ’s version of an A.
Two, if you get your work out there and then find that it needs to be made more perfect, well, then, you’ll improve it, right?
That’s how you roll.
How is your desire to do the perfect thing getting in the way of your doing anything?
The What If…Workshop: where imagination meets practicality. It’s only $147 and it starts next week 11/18/13 — check it out here (link funky? try pasting this into your browser: https://sambennett.infusionsoft.com/app/orderForms/What-IfWorkshop )
And I’m so excited about this new class that I wrote you a poem…
What If…
This last year was the year
for sure
where you were
getting organized
getting the book done
getting the clutter cleared
starting yoga – again –
and really connecting with your
Inner Voice.
Really figuring out what you really want.
Really asking for it.
Really getting it.
But it seems like every time you tried to
make a move
someone needed you
there was a crisis
the dog got sick and
the roof broke open and
he lost his job and
those tests at the hospital what a
long night that was and
the money just wasn’t there – again –
And then
and then
and then
the voices in your head got started:
Who Do You Think You Are, Anyway?
Everyone’s Already Doing That.
You’re Not Qualified.
The Technology Is Too Hard.
Plus
You Never Finish Anything Anyway.
And so you stand there with the crumpled remains of a year in your hands.
Your hands that ache
to write
to play
to draw
to dance
to work
to share
to shape
to cut
to color
to create.
Your heart cries out.
Your hands cry out.
Please don’t let it be too late.
Wait.
It’s not too late.
It’s never too late.
As long as you draw breath,
it cannot be too late.
Start now.
I mean RIGHT NOW.
Write one sentence right now.
Keep one promise to yourself right now.
Do something just for you right now.
Be undistractible.
Because this is your year for sure.
©2013 Sam Bennett
Where imagination meets practicality: dreaming, prioritizing and doing for creative wackadoodle geniuses like you and me.
4 sessions:
Monday, Nov. 18 – Monday, Dec. 9
5pm PT/8pm ET
– You do not have to be there in person.
– All sessions are recorded & available for download so you can listen again & again.
– Call in from wherever you are OR listen online.
– This ALL-NEW curriculum is perfect for you if:
You want to get clear about what you should do next & the “next steps” that will get you there.
You want to get out of your own way.
You are sick of perfectionism blocking your happiness & productivity.
You’re ready to quit doing things the same old way and try something new.
You’re in the mood to experiment.
You’ve been meaning to take a workshop with me, but it just hasn’t been the right time, right offer or right price up to now.
And of course, satisfaction is guaranteed or your tuition cheerfully refunded.
—> find out more about The What If…Workshop here
Did I mention that it’s only $147?
See, that’s because I know I’ve been offering a lot of higher-end stuff this year, and it was important to me to close out this year with a no-brainer offer that anyone, at any level, could participate in and get GREAT BENEFIT from.
Let me know what you think about it, hm? After all, YOU all are my “market research” : ) and your feedback really matters to me.
—> find out more about The What If…Workshop here (click now because it starts next week! EEEP!)
P.S. What’s YOUR “What If…”? I bet you could help a lot of people by sharing it in the comments below….
Zone of Genius.
Being in Flow.
Work That Doesn’t Feel Like Work.
Creative people have a special talent for getting into the groove of a project and surfing the energy of it for hours and hours.
In this state of creative flow, there is no such thing as fear, procrastination, anxiety or self-doubt — there is only the joy of the work.
Wouldn’t it be great if you could make money from that same joyful place?
How much money would you like to be bringing in?
How much time would you like to spend each week on your art?
How many people do you think you could help if you were to create this life?
I know it’s possible, because I’ve done it.
And I’d like to help you do it.
Join The 94th Percentile
-
Only 6% of entrepreneurs ever make it to six-figures. (I’m one of them.)
Less than 10% of actors ever earn more than $10,000/year acting. (I’m one of them.)
Selling over 200 copies of a book of poetry makes it a “best-seller.” (I’ve done well over that.)
Less than 2% of completed manuscripts ever get a publishing contract. (I’ve done that.)
Now, these statistics are debatable, but even so, if you read them the wrong way you might come to believe that I am some kind of superwoman.
Not so.
I succeeded at those things because I had an idea and didn’t stop working until I made that idea a reality.
I succeeded because I was undistractible.
I succeeded because I didn’t know what I was doing was impossible.
Luckily, impossible things happen every day.
The truth I see is this:
The Odds Have Nothing To Do With Your Probability of Success
Odds are important when it comes to things that involve mathematical certainty – not creative success.
Once you are actually getting your work out into the world, the idea of “odds” becomes completely immaterial.
Conventional wisdom matters when you are doing conventional things.
Creativity and entrepreneurship are, by definition, the opposite of conventional.
Logic applies to things that obey the rules of logic.
Art and love and creative success is anything but logical.
So get those negative voices OUT of your head.
You CAN succeed doing what you love.
You CAN make money doing what you love.
You CAN create a life that is perfect for you.
Reinventing the Wheel
The problem is that no one ever taught you how to take control of your creative power and use it to help people & make money.
Some of you may have even been taught that making art was “selfish” and a sure-fire way to become a “starving artist.” I say: HOOEY.
There is plenty of money and success and joy in the world for those who want to go get it.
And I think you might be one of those people.
What If I Gave You My System and We Customized It For You?
What if we could spend the day together here in Southern California (somewhere around Los Angeles or Santa Barbara) and together we could make a plan for you to:
– bring in at least $1,500/month doing work you love
– have a marketing plan that feels like a party
– schedule your time so you get plenty of rest, meditation and exercise
I’m opening up a few spaces in my calendar for some select individuals to join me for a Big Wheel VIP Day.
We’ll meet in a swanky hotel room (my treat and of course you’ll stay the night : ) and talk, work, have lunch, work some more and by the middle of the afternoon, we’ll have created a fun, workable plan for you to execute over the next 3 months.
I’ll also give you monthly follow-up calls plus email support.
Does this sound interesting to you?
I urge you to fill out the no-obligation application HERE —
Even if you have no intention of ever doing this VIP day thing, the act of answering the quesions can be VERY ILLUMINATING. And I promise I won’t care if you fill it out and then never take another step. No worries.
Once my team gets your application, we’ll review it and if it seems like a good fit, we’ll invite you to have a 20-minute Big Wheel Evaluation Session with me.
MY PROMISE: I will not let you invest in this day with me unless I’m pretty confident we can create something at least as good as the plan I’ve outlined above. If I don’t think you’re ready, I won’t let you book it. Fair deal?
Willing to Take One Small Step?
I want you to fill out the no-obligation application HERE — and then, if you decide you’re really interested, we’ll talk about whether or not it’s the right move for you.
Thank you for reading.
And please leave a comment below to let me know how all this strikes you — I’m very interested in your reaction to this offer.
P.S. Here’s the reason I’m excited about offering the Big Wheel VIP Day experience:
I’m at my best when I can work intensively on one big project. Spending 4 hours with me all at once is better than a full year of monthly calls – I guarantee it.
I get more inspired, more intuitive and more genius-y when I get to spend the day focused on YOU.
So that’s why I’m offering this new format – because I think it will be more effective than anything else I’ve ever offered.
Fill out the application and see how it feels, why don’t you?
Thanks for being willing to experiment with me.
– SSB
This short video with the special offer gets taken down at midnight 8/30/13 – don’t delay!
So I’m at an audition for a network TV show this morning (good show, good little part – I’ll let you know if I book it : ) and into the quiet waiting room barrels in this actress – let’s call her “Sally” – and she flops herself in a chair and immediately starts complaining. Loudly.
She’s complaining about the heat and the parking and her hurt ankle and the show she used to be on that got cancelled and her mechanic who’s probably a crook and this famous film director who’s a horse’s ass and were they running late because she hated it when she had to wait around in a casting office especially for such a dumb little part…
Shocking, right?
To walk into what is, basically, a JOB INTERVIEW and do nothing but 1) complain and 2) play the victim and then 3) bad-mouth other people in the industry?!?!?
Wow.
You don’t have to be an actor to know that kind of behavior is unacceptable. Poisonous, even.
But here’s the thing: I don’t think Sally thought she was being rude. I think she thought she was – honestly – just making conversation.
I think Sally is so caught up in the little punishments of life that she’s completely forgotten to focus on the good stuff.
(Do you find yourself complaining and commiserating just to make small talk?)
I think Sally has been disappointed so many times that she’s started to predict doom no matter what.
(Do you guard yourself from good, not wanting to get your hopes up?)
And Sally didn’t look very healthy to me; I suspect her weight makes her physically uncomfortable which also darkens her mood.
(Is your body making you miserable?)
Here’s what’s funny: when I think about it, everything Sally said was basically true.
I also had noticed that it was really hot outside and the parking was kind of confusing and I’m sure that famous film director really is a horse’s ass… BUT NONE OF THAT BOTHERS ME.
I was happy to be at the audition. I’ll be happy if I get the part and just as happy if I don’t. I like my life. I like my body. I like acting. I like writing emails to you all. I even liked my long drive into LA, because I got to listen to one of my favorite inspirational CDs.
None of it feels like a chore because it all feels like a blessing.
My happiness is not circumstantial.
I have taught myself to be joyful pretty much no matter what. And I see the results of that joy in my work, in my bank account, in my relationships and in my environment.
If you’d like to increase your JOY, CREATIVITY and PRODUCTIVITY then I invite you to join me for my brand-new Start Right Where You Are program that starts this Wed. Sept. 4th.
(Type in the promo code “Carol” and you can get a secret 6-pay plan of less than $97/month! YAY!)
The video above features a special offer that ENDS TODAY at MIDNIGHT (Friday, Aug. 30 at 12 midnight PT) and of course it’s satisfaction guaranteed or your money cheerfully refunded so if you think this course might be fun then, honey — JUMP IN!
Just click on the image to see the video or go to: www.StartRightWhereYouAre.com
Let’s make this fall a time of true transformation for you, so you can rediscover the joy of being you no matter what.
I’d love to work with you.
P.S. End your indecision, confusion and feelings of overwhelm by joining my brand-new program: Start Right Where You Are. It’s a webinar once every 2 weeks to get you clear, activated and creative – click here.
(Use the promo code “Carol” and get a 6-pay plan of just $96/month!).
Satisfaction guaranteed or your money cheerfully refunded. – S.
Sometimes when you make a big change in your life, all hell breaks loose around you.
I mean, here you are, all pumped up from your brand-new and exciting decision to…
….leave your overworked/underpaid job
….start taking better care of yourself
….clear your clutter
….start charging what you’re worth
….actually work on your creative project for 15 minutes every day
And you’re feeling so good and brave!
You feel joyful and excited and have butterflies in your stomach!
And then….
And then….
And then…
someone you love gets sick (hospital sick)
or
you get fired (and you were going to quit anyway, but wow…fired???!!)
or
your lover gets mad (ugly mad)
or
your house falls apart (the roof literally caves in)
or
or
or
And it really seems like there is no way you can possibly follow through on your new commitment to your self, your creativity and your prosperity.
It really seems like you must abandon your new decision and go back – at least for a little while – to the way things were.
But please please don’t.
You Must Keep Your Resolve — Especially When It Seems Impossible.
These Troubles Are A Kind Of A Test.
Now I’m not saying that you should ignore the sick person or leave your lover or fail to fix the house.
I’m saying you’ve got to manage these “Helena Handbasket Moments” in A NEW WAY.
Welcome to Transformation-Induced Chaos.
When you think about it, it’s no surprise there’s so much turmoil — you are changing and growing at lightening speed and you’re going to get some splashback, right?
So the secret is not to take all this chaos as a sign to revert to your old behavior.
Sam’s Slightly Counter-Intuitive Two-Fold Remedy for Transformation-Induced Chaos
The two-fold trick to managing this might seem a bit counter-intuitive:
1) Focus first on yourself and your well-being
2) Focus on the money
So for #1, make sure that you are calm, rested, fed and centered. Nothing good happens when you are running around undernourished in any sense of the word.
Take time for your art, for your spiritual work and for the things that bring you joy. In this way, you’ll be able to negotiate the pesky “circumstances” of your life. (And yes, even the IRS, the threat of divorce and the shadow of bankruptcy is just a circumstance — it’s no reason to lose your balance : )
And for #2, keep your eye on your highest-income producing activities.
Stand firm in your rate increase.
Refuse to work cheap.
Draw a firm boundary around your creative-work time each day.
Celebrate your daily successes AND keep it up!
You will be much better able to help yourself and the people in your life if you are bringing in a healthy income.
(Please note: bringing in a healthy income will not suddenly turn you into a money-grubber, a shallow, materialistic person, nor will it take away from your street cred as a “real” artist. It will simply give you the freedom to make new choices.)
So while it may seem “selfish” to be out getting new clients when your family is in crisis, it’s actually an act of compassion. You are putting your own oxygen mask on first.
And it may seem “irresponsible” to keep your meditation time each morning when your lover is so upset, but it’s actually an act of true love. You are nourishing the love within yourself so you can better share it with another.
And while others may rush to judge you and your new priorities, their criticism is just a light breeze blowing by as you walk, run, rush pellmell or stagger into your new life.
Keep your eye on your prize.
What’s the prize?
A satisfying creative life filled with love.
How to change your life without running-around-crazy-like-your-hair’s-on-fire – aka – how to stay serene and joyful while you change the world is a bit of a challenge.
But if you’re ready for the chaos and you stand firm and fight, you can find a gateway to a whole new kind of heaven.
We hear this story all the time:
“I tried everything! And then finally…”
Finally, the solution is found.
Finally, the right diet and exercise plan kicks in.
Finally, your perfect partner arrives in your life.
Finally, the gate that seemed locked is opened.
And maybe part of us thinks,
“Jeez, if only I’d tried this sooner…”
But to me, the important part of the story is the first part:
I Tried Everything.
Yes, you did. You tried things and you kept trying and you kept showing up and you persisted even when you were so discouraged you couldn’t even think straight. That’s how a person gets to the “finally” part. By staying on the path and putting one foot in front of the other.
That’s faith in action.
And for those of you who haven’t gotten to the “finally” part of the story – oh, honey – I feel your pain.
Especially when everyone around you has such helpful suggestions. Suggestions like, “Oh, when you stop trying – that’s when it will happen!” Really? Or, “You should try this thing that worked for me/my sister/my neighbor’s best friend in Ohio.” Really?
And maybe you’re even thinking about giving up. And maybe you should.
Here’s one way to get a reading on whether or not you should just give up: make a picture in your mind of you just setting down this burden. Imagine you just taking the whole heavy load and setting it down right there on the side of the road. Imagine taking a few steps down the road away from it.
How do you feel? Relieved?
Then maybe, sweetheart, it’s time to set it down for now – not necessarily for always, but for now.
Or do you feel that welling up of spirit (your parents might have called it “stubbornness”) that says, “I WILL find a way!” If that’s so, then all righty. Pick your bundle up and walk on. And keep trying everything – even crazy things, even the thing that worked for that person in Ohio.
And someday – I guarantee it – you will be able to tell the story of your journey and say, “Well, I tried everything, and then finally…”
So tell me – what circumstance in your life had you trying everything? And what finally worked? Or are you still in it? What have you tried? What are you thinking of doing next?
