Minimum Daily Requirement

The good news… this quick tip will help you with any project or goal you are interested in starting or completing.

Now find the tension between you and your goal and get started today!

Chapter 14 – Minimum Daily Requirement

Now, I love home-remodeling shows, but I also believe that we are naturally inclined toward productivity. We love to be learning, doing, and playing. We love to stretch and grow and solve problems, and we love to feel like we’re making a contribution to the world . Too much unstructured time can be stressful and depressing. When we don’t know what to do with ourselves, we give up.

The trick is to inject some creative tension into your life. The word tension gets a bad rap, but remember that it is structural tension that holds the keystone in every arch — and sexual tension is often the beginning of all kinds of wonderful things .

Think of a goal that frightens you a little bit, something that stirs you up, maybe even something that you’re pretty sure is impossible. Let it loom large in your mind. Connect with it. Feel the energetic relationship — the tension — between where you are now and where the goal is. Feel that energetic spoke of the net between you and that goal, and let that tension to pull you forward into taking one first step.

When you’ve taken one step, celebrate. It’s easy to brush aside first steps, especially when you believe that you really should be farther along already, but don’t. You did something, which is more than you did yesterday. Which is excellent. Be proud.

To finish reading… just grab a copy here: http://www.StartRightWhereYouAre.com

Completion Is Overrated

Completion Is Overrated

Chapter 9 – Completion is Overrated

There’s a half-completed sweater in the knitting basket. There’s the first three chapters of a novel in a drawer. There are the specialty tools that you bought to make the ornaments for baby’s first Christmas, even though baby is now entering the fifth grade.

When you see a reminder of something you’ve left undone everywhere you look, you are automatically going to feel exhausted. Half-completed tasks create what productivity guru David Allen calls “open loops” in your mind, and those open loops take up a lot of bandwidth.

There are plenty of good reasons to have stopped moving forward on a project. You might have simply lost interest. That’s fine. There are no starving creative artists in Antarctica being deprived because you didn’t finish what’s on your plate, so to speak.

You might have stopped because you made a mistake or hit a wall, and your misguided perfectionism won’t let you keep going. This could be a good time to make some 5-Minute Art about that perfectionist voice and see if you can’t liberate your project from her thorny clutches. It’s not like there’s really a right way to do creative things .

Fear of commitment can sometimes play a role, too. Allowing yourself to get too deep into a project might mean that it’s actually important to you, and it might have a real impact on your life, your work, and your relationships. So you keep it casual. Being a creative Casanova might feel like it’s protecting your heart, but ultimately you’re setting yourself up for dissatisfaction. What do you suppose might happen if you committed fully to your work?

I’ve also seen people quit mid-project because they find themselves in what the master consensus facilitator Sam Kaner calls the “Groan Zone.” He uses this expression to describe the point in consensus facilitation where diverse opinions have been expressed, and it feels like you’ve reached an impasse and will never find common ground — which is often the moment right before some new and beautiful solution emerges. I find it works equally well to refer to the sloggy middle of any project. Once that new-project smell has worn off and the end seems too far away, it’s easy to let boredom and discouragement take the wheel. Try creating some mini-goals, or even micro-goals, and make sure you’re rewarding yourself for your incremental progress.

Little Changes Action Step: Have a frank conversation with your inner, wise self about one of your half-done projects, and make a swift decision to either let it go or to schedule time in your calendar so you can get back to work on it.

To finish reading… just grab a copy here: http://www.StartRightWhereYouAre.com

It Is Not Possible…

It Is Not Possible…

It is not possible to lose 30 pounds.
It is not possible to write a book.
It is not possible to clear out all the clutter.

You know why?

Because it is only possible to lose a few ounces a day.

And it is only possible to write a sentence or two — maybe a few pages.

It is only possible to clear a bit of the room at a time.

This may seem like just word play, but stick with me here — because I think this is important for two reasons.

1) The Goal Cannot Be Achieved All At Once

Especially if you have a BIG goal, you may have put off working on it because…well, it just seems too big.

It’s so big that you don’t know where to even start.

It’s so big that you doubt you can complete it.

It’s so big that you question your worthiness, your credibility, your right to even attempt such a thing. (The phrase, “Who do I think I am?” may show up here.)

But when you remember that it is not the BIG goal that needs to be accomplished, but rather just the immediate step that’s right in front of you….

Well, that feels much better, doesn’t it?

(Need a suggestion for what one immediate step might be? Try picking one action that will take less than 15 minutes and is easily within your budget.)

And here’s some even better news:

2) The Goal Is Not a Destination

You may have noticed that sometimes you DO complete a big project, and you end up feeling sort of….deflated.

Depressed.

That post-Christmas let-down feeling.

Because you thought you were done.

You thought that once you achieved your goal you would be complete – and that something would change.

But once you lose 30 pounds, you still have to maintain all the discipline and self-love that got you there.

And once you complete your manuscript, it’s not as though you are done writing.

And even if every bit of clutter gets swept away from your place, it’s only a matter of time until more clutter creeps in.

This is not failure.
This is process.

So you might find it comforting that you are mid-process on just about everything.

That means it’s not too late to take the next step.

It’s not too late to begin again.

It’s not too late to delight the world with your art.

Nearly Miraculous Daily Habit

Nearly Miraculous Daily Habit

“…Because you told me I was a stuntwoman and I believed you…” Painting by Lesley Perdomo

Allot Fifteen Minutes a Day to Your Project

If I could actually make you do stuff, the first thing I would get you to do is to spend fifteen minutes each and every day working on your project.

As it happens, you are the agent of change in your life, and I can’t really make you do anything.

But I strongly urge you to make this daily commitment to your project.

Do fifteen minutes every morning

— before you check your email, before you check your email, before you check your email…working on your project.

You will need an iron will to resist the siren call of the Internet, but it’s worth it.

Whatever’s out there can wait while you put yourself first for just a few minutes.

So get out your kitchen timer, or use the timer on your cell phone (in which case you can select an alert sound that you particularly enjoy), and even if you just sit still for fifteen minutes, you will profit.

I’ve heard from my students with attention deficit disorders that using a timer is an especially useful focusing ritual.

You will be amazed by how much work you can get done in fifteen minutes. You will be flat-out astonished by how much progress you make by putting in fifteen minutes a day, seven days a week, for a week, for a month, for three months, for a year.

Intellectually, this makes perfect sense. You know that if you practiced guitar every day for fifteen minutes, before long you’d be a better guitar player.

If you spend fifteen minutes a day writing a novel, eventually you will have written a novel.

If you spend fifteen minutes a day working on your abs, pretty soon you’ll have strengthened your core.

But emotionally this strategy doesn’t feel like it will work. It feels too small and too half-baked.

It may also trigger some feelings of rebellion, anger, despair, or fatigue. Sometimes those feelings show up right when you’re on the verge of a breakthrough.

You might want to think of this as your Daily Fifteen Minutes of Fame.

It ’s your chance to treat yourself like a famous artist for fifteen minutes every day.

After all, would a famous artist have any trouble claiming this small amount of time for herself ? Of course not.

Maybe you’re thinking, “Okay, Sam, but how do I go about this fifteen-minute thing?” Here ’s what I recommend:

Your Daily Fifteen Minutes of Fame — the Why

Quickly — without pondering — close your eyes for a moment and ask yourself, “What does this project represent for me? What value of mine does it represent?” and just let the answer bubble up from inside.

Maybe your answer will be “freedom” or “joy” or “self- expression” or “love” or “escape from the cubicle” or “to prove everybody wrong” — whatever word or phrase brings a little smile to your face is the right one.

You might even make yourself a little sign with your word or phrase on it and post it on or near your timer. (You could even grab a paint pen and decorate your kitchen timer if you were so inclined — a bit of glitter and glue, anyone?)

Your Daily Fifteen Minutes of Fame — the What

Working swiftly, brainstorm a list of fifteen-minute tasks.

Include a wide variety, since some days you might wake up feeling bold and want to tackle something brave such as “entering poetry contest,” and on others you’ll feel quiet and shy and want to do something simple like doodling or daydreaming. With this list at hand, you can quickly select the task that matches your mood.

For example, if I were writing a play called Romeo and Juliet, my list of fifteen-minute tasks might look something like this:

• Write a quickie character sketch of the nurse.
• Research poisons and sleeping draughts.
• Work on the balcony scene.
• Call agent.
• Brainstorm titles (Capulet vs. Montague, Why Fifteen-Year-Old
Girls Should Not Be Allowed to Go Dancing Unchaperoned )
• Write an author’s bio for the back cover.
• Double-check penalties for dueling.
• Write a blog post about doing the wrong thing for the right reasons.
• Research whether a rose by any other name really would
smell as sweet.

Your Daily Fifteen Minutes of Fame — the When

I usually suggest working in the morning, just because getting stuff out of the way first thing seems to work for a lot of people, including myself, but you might find that working after school works well (family homework time?) or just before bedtime.

Some people like to work in the middle of the night. Experiment.

LUNCHTIME PLAYS

My friend Emilie Beck is an award-winning playwright and theater director, and once she wrote a play (two plays, actually) in twenty-minute increments.

She had two small boys at home and a very demanding full-time job, and twenty minutes each day during her lunch hour was truly the only time she had.

It was not her preferred method of working, to be sure, but she made the best of it.

She found not only that she was able to do some great work but also that the action of writing every day helped remind her of her life goals, and kept her in touch with her artist-self, which was, I imagine, in danger of getting temporarily swallowed up by her mommy-self and her executive-self.

LESLEY’S STORY (In her own words)

I will be honest, I didn’t believe you at first. You were so adamant about how only fifteen minutes a day can help you complete a project. “Yeah, right,” kept sounding in my head. It was that same voice that always held me back from starting a project because I never knew where to start.

Whether I was starting a necklace or a painting, I always felt that if I started it, then I would have to finish it right then and there. That is a lot of pressure, so I would sometimes just shrug off some great ideas.

I figured I had nothing to lose by following your advice. I set the timer on my cell phone and started a neck- lace right away. It took me three fifteen-minute sessions to complete one, but by the end of the week, I had three more necklaces than I had anticipated.

I filled in my fifteen minutes with production, and I started to value what fifteen minutes can bring you in a day, a week, and a month! So I decided to transfer this wisdom to my paintings.

Sometimes I would feel inspired to go longer than fifteen minutes. However, if I had only fifteen minutes to give to a project, I was okay with it.

What I am sharing with you today is a painting that I started in February 2011 and finally completed it August 2011. This painting is very meaningful to me and expresses the journey that I have embarked on since starting the fifteen-minutes-a-day process.

The background is a tile collage of different tattoo images that I found in various tattoo magazines (during my fifteen minutes a day I would skim through magazines and cut out my favorite images). Soon I had collected enough to fill up the canvas (again, in different fifteen-minute segments, I glued them to every quadrant of that canvas).

Once the canvas was filled, I started painting the woman. (In those fifteen-minute segments I learned how to get the skin tones I liked, and I played with shadow.)

I will be honest: sometimes during my fifteen-minute segments I would just stare at the canvas and try to figure out what my next move would be. But those fifteen minutes of thought are what helped bring about the spiderweb, the filigree, and the crystals, all of which helped me complete this painting.

I call this painting the Stuntwoman, which is something you once called me. I have found balance in my life, in my career, by just appreciating fifteen minutes every day.

By the way, I gave Lesley the stuntwoman idea because once as she was talking to me about feeling overwhelmed by her schedule, I suggested that she consider the idea of being busy without buying into the story that busy equals being stressed out:

“Think about being busy in the same way that a surgeon is busy during an operation,” I told her. “Be busy like a trapeze artist flying through the air, or like a stuntwoman — just cleanly moving through each task with great clarity, concentration, and grace.”

An Ode To The Overwhelmed

An Ode To The Overwhelmed

And as you stand there

Late again

Because you forgot to allow time to park
And the elevator was slow

And you left 10 minutes late to begin with
With your shoes that pinch

And your pants that are a little too small
Since you started eating white bread again

And as you paw through your bag
Looking for the suite number
That you’re not sure you wrote down to begin with

Let us now praise you.

You, the untidy.

You, the careless.

You, the easily distracted by sparkly things.

The money you spend on late fees alone
Could feed a family in Africa –

Which reminds you that you meant to send in the kids’ Unicef money and
Forgot.

And that despite your best efforts,
You rarely eat a square meal,
You almost never get enough sleep

And exercise seems like a word that magazines have developed
Just to make you feel bad about yourself.

But you are good and brave.

You, flying by the seat of your pants

Making it work

Putting out fires

Saying your prayers

And dancing your dance of now and later and maybe and

I’ll–have-to-call-you-back-on-that-could-you-send-me-an-email-to-remind-me-to-call-you-back-on-that?

As innocent as each morning’s sunrise,

You are a fount of good intentions.

Your good humor is as graceful as a baby giraffe,
Even if that joke you were trying to make to the hotel clerk fell flat
And your toast at the wedding came out sounding a little….funny.

But you have gifts that no one knows about.

You have the strength to bend in the wind

You have the joyful spirit that loves a good belly laugh,

You have the wisdom to understand that everything will all come out all right in the end and

You have the faith to light a candle rather than curse the darkness.

That is, if you could find the book of matches from that romantic restaurant that you went to for your anniversary but since you didn’t have a reservation they made you wait at the bar for half an hour during which you had two appletinis and the rest of the night is a bit of a blur.

So much for the overpriced lingerie.

You are beautiful.

You are beautiful.

Frazzled and overworked and underpaid

You are the one who forgot your wallet

And forgot your receipt for the dry cleaners

And forgot your keys which you just set down five seconds ago, so where could they possibly have gone?

But you never forget to say, “I love you”

And you never forget to give a big smile to that nice parking guy

And you never fail to show endless patience when the

Too-tightly wrapped and overly-conscientious start to offer their Oh-so-helpful suggestions about how you might feel better if you would just learn to alphabetize your spice rack.

You are beautiful.

So, wear the lingerie on Monday for no reason.

And why not just refuse to participate in the bake sale this year?

And give yourself a compliment for something you did well today.

Because you are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known.